Today in the news light bulbs are going up in price because they seem yellow when they are turned on.
Also in the news Tony Blair made a speech about the piano issue.
"If only i had been reading the Daily Crumb recently i would have known of these lies. Whether the monkey who owns it is my friend or not, he is a still backstabbing. The Piano issue IS A RUMOUR! I DID NOT DROP A PIANO on a unsuspecting witness, except the one who died. Other than the one who died i am not guilty.
I wipe my bloody hands of it. Not that they have blood on... there is no evidence to suggest i even own or owned a piano."
"Is it true your pencil sharpener broke recently and you went into a mad house fit."
"10 Downing street has told me i am not aloud to answer anymore questions from the Daily Crumb. Any others?"
The Daily Star: "Does your family agree to the mishaps of blood on your hands?"
"Thats.. WAIT NO! THAT WAS A RUMOUR CREATED BY THE DAILY CRUMB. IT IS NOT REAL! What about some real issues, like the WAR... isnt that just the slightest bit important?"
The Daily Star: "So you are denying it?"
The Daily Crumb: "He is ya know."
"I AM DENYING IT BECAUSE IT IS NOT REAL"
The Daily Star: "Have the police inquired into this matter?"
"NO BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE WASTEING POLICE TIME!"
The Daily Crumb: "Is it true your washing machine broke now and you were so angry you put your hand in an electric toaster?"
The Daily Star: "Did he? FRONT PAGE NEWS!"
The Daily Crumb: "Yes, terrible electric shock, check his fingers."
The Daily Star: "But might that be why he has blood on his hands?"
The Daily Crumb: "We'll need to find out whether the blood came from the toaster or the man crushed by the piano."
"IT WAS THE GUY UNDER THE PIANO'S BLOOD, OK?
Daily Crumb: "Is it true the man was your piano tutor?"
- Nathan (munch) Viney
- Policestation, "Has anyone got a lighter?"
- Football, snap cards game idea.