Monday, December 29, 2008

Christmas Day TV

Today in the news a man got lost in a cake universe.

Also in the news

Well Christmas is over and the new year is waiting for a broken back.
The lights, the colours. It will all be over soon, i hope you made the most of it. If you were complaining that 'it was meant to be a time of happiness and you were actually depressed' it is your loss. Maybe that will teach you for next year. Have you not seen the chripy New York Christmas movies that scatter across television over the Christmas season? They'll teach you whats what.
I watched a great British one where a mother with two daughters were living in a giant store full of everything from foods and furniture to christmas decorations and tents. They came across a wonderful adventure and ended up getting a free meal with a one legged pirate from Blackadder who had recently met S Club 7 who are actually dead now.
It was a lovely TV movie. Mainly because i love the idea of living and hiding inside a store full of everything. Astonishingly it was called 'The Greatest Store in the World. '
It starred Dervla Kirwan as the mother.
Later on that evening we saw the wonderful new Wallace and Gromit Film which was as expected. Unique compared to the other films, and freshly baked. I very much enjoyed this rather predictable but loveable film. Then of course was the depressing stories of Eastenders which were up to standard, everything messed up.
I was surprised to see Ian Beale with a smile that was not related to an evil plot.
Dervla Kirwan, the mother in the earlier film then appeared in the wonderful Christmas Episode of DOCTOR WHO!

Doctor Who: The Next Doctor
None of the Christmas Episodes have been 'brilliant' compared to some of the series episodes but this one was definitely at the top of the list.

So it began just mumbo jumbo, whats going on? But that made it exciting with flying up the walls and sliding on the floors. With SO much confusion you knew it HAD to be explained somehow as the episode went on.
With the two brilliant actors, David and David the story panned out and became easily understandable.
Maybe Russell's earlier writings have not been clear due to the actors abilities? Aah.. nah probably not. There is no doubt, Russell is a fantastic writer, but having to write SO many episodes a lot of them lack...
As i said earlier the Christmas episodes have never been amazing,
Chrissy 1. because of the 'directing' (i'm sorry Mr. Director for that episode)
Each one has topped the other though.
Chrissy 2. Catherine Tate was a pain.. and continued to be when she was brought back mysteriously. I know many of you wont agree with me. At points in the series she really did well. I blamed a lot of her annoying performances on writing, 'Partners in Crime' and some points in 'Pompeii'.
Chrissy 3. Titanic.
I thought this was my favourite Christmas episode with the golden colours, great effects and epic writing. Although the whole 'REASON' behind the story shot past at first viewing and well, didnt make much sense.
Also, that bridge scene, killing everyone off in one go? That didnt annoy me too much when i first viewed it though. It was the slow motion falling and waving at the camera as they moved towards their deaths. Every single one of them changed position when they fell!
I'm rambling on, THE NEXT DOCTOR, i think i like better than any of those episodes.

The Next Doctor was full of great photography, camera tricks, colours and a very original first half story with the 'other doctor'.
That, is how a story is meant to pan out. I very much enjoyed that, the era was perfect. The red dress in the snow was a wonderful touch as well as the cybermen's electricity in the white background.
Then they topped it all off with a giant robot stamping on the town, and it looked SWELL. Very well done, the cgi has upped a lot since Christopher and i thought it went well with the story. Miss. Hartigan was amazing a long with the rest of the supporting characters.
She of course becomes the CYBERKING. Which was... also great. A little odd at times with her sitting in the (i think its the mouth of the giant robot with her armoured guards beside her).
But this was ignored (by me) when the Doctor used the BALLOON Tardis.
I think the colours are really what made this whole episode amazing, from Morrissey's clothing to the night scenes.
The Cybershades were also a nice touch, just something tiny to tag along. Apart from them being like pantomime animals their jumping and climbing skills were awesome.
But, like the TITANIC ending the reason behind how the Doctor defeated them was shot past but luckily still understandable at the same time.
The balloon, the robot, both standing tall in the sky made the episode close fine. Then the folks below finally applauded the doctor, another nice touch to the story. I am just ending on little points now, the second being as a doctor who fan i loved seeing the memory of faces appear from the infostamp.

And thats it!
I cannot really decide which is the best Christmas episode. Catherine Tate's had the TARDIS flyby on the road which was amazing. Titantic has.. well a flying space Titantic and this episode was just grand.
I think this Christmas wins because of the first half storyline. :)

Have a happy new year!
- The Daily Crumb

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas

from the Daily Crumb!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Tomothy and Pals: Killed off on Christmas Day

Today in the news graffiti tag on mailbox.
Anonymous Artist recieves mailbox in the mail.

Also in the news
Tomothy and Pals: Killed off on Christmas Day

Tomothy and Pals: Killed off on Christmas Day from Benjamin Biscuitboy on Vimeo.

- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, December 18, 2008

I can smell Christmas

Today in the news a man was found with an amazing sense of smell.
He said this, "I smelt prison in that mans past."
The police said good job and arrested an innocent man.

Also, Blob corp released a very short christmas treat which you can check out here http://blobcorp.blogspot.com/

And here is the last screenshot of Tomothy and Pals Christmas 2008
I am nearing the end now

The story of which has been kept secret. Thats a first!

- The Daily Crumb

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Blob and The Earth Child

Today in the news i was going to joke around with a Christmas song.

9 min 39, Blob and the Earth Child is Matthew Menhenick's new Animated Adventure released only on Youtube for your delight.

Introducing a whole heap of new characters (The Elements), Blob has to save the day once again but this time making some strong new friends.
This cartoon has a great story and very entertaining for a younger audience, the colours, unique and clear characters make the story easy to follow and recognise.

Not to mention how great the high lords voice is.. *cough* BUT in truth his voice meshs with the choice of music grandly. I love the 'painted' like images behind him as he speaks about the many elements. Also, their unique hats.
For Matt, it must be great to see his drawing (Blob) becoming a person of his own on the screen. With his plants, sun bed/ deck chair and drink.
Both Blob and the Earth Child as well as the High Lord and the General were good double act teams.
All in all it was well directed as well, seeing the animation improving. And constantly being ahead of me with camera angles :(
well done! Well worth the wait.
The best feature yet!

Have a watch of the film, and check out his website for new updates if you like the work.
Blobcorp.blogspot.com


- The Daily Crumb


Grave of the Fireflies and Christmas Cast List

Today in the news basket of food given to dead body.

First off, before even thinking about the depression Grave of the Fireflies produces here is the cast list for the Tomothy and Pals Christmas.

Tomothy: Benjamin Biscuitboy
Jerome: Courtney Leacock
Ellie: Eloise Viney
Tadhg: Tadhg Viney
Vinnie: Lee Sands
Monet the bear: Mike Swain

I'm very happy to have Mike Swain in this short! weeheee!

Because Blob Corp are good at releasing screenshots (blobcorp.blogspot.com) formerly RMNCOPZ Blog.
I will.

So this is Jerome on the phone, and they've just hung up on him OUCH

________________________________
Studio Ghibli:
Grave of the Fireflies

Sure, they're ghosts so they're going to die.
But hopefully they hav a nice eventful, jolly time before they pass away.
No they dont, without ruining the film for anyone it starts off depressing, the middle is a bit lighter and then it ends depressing.
To be honest, a fantastic story, but not one id read to the kids.

A note for all UK readers, Whisper of the Heart is being shown on channel 4 this week i believe so set your recorders.

- The Daily Crumb


- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Tomothy and Pals: Belt on

Today in the news Blur Live tickets for 2009 Hyde Park are bought by me.
Also in the news:

Thought id let anyone know that the new Tomothy and Pals is moving fast, not good, but fast and that is of course the most important thing.

So here is an irrelevant picture.
One day Tomothy and his friends go on a little picnic, they soon realise that there is a friendly woodland animal that can play piano near by.
Unfortunately that is not the story.


- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, December 11, 2008

This christmas Adam Phillips brings you a new look at Christmas, Christmas Time

Today in the news we'll hold them down by putting stones on their feet.

Before we all go crazy over Adam Phillips' new chrissy short im just letting people know Tomothy and Pals will be back for a short youtube video this Christmas.
And without any further applause.
Bitey.com presents:
Click the image



- The Daily Crumb

Monday, December 08, 2008

Well would you look at the quality on that

Today in the news i already told you the big story (on the post below) but a tiny story has just emerged. We will let you know when we can read it.

Why didnt i think of it before?
Vimeo.com!




- The Daily Crumb

US Ponyo Update and 'Murder the Farmer'

Today in the news a farmer was run over by a tractor. In an interview the tractor said, "I felt a large head being cut open below the wheels. When i saw the blood on the windows i did not laugh. I only prayed that one day i would be forgiven for murdering this monster. He was well known for abusing his tractors. hitting us with hammers and logs.
But this, of course was an accident."
Police arrived at the scene and have corned it off as attempted murder and a suspicious event. Chief of Police had this to say, "It is a very suspicious case, how on earth did this tractor learn to speak and think by himself? Without releasing too much information, i have to say we are worried that this may be a version of American warfare."
The farmer said this, "I was minding me own buisness, id just finished grinding a set of keys against the metal side of the tractor and suddenly it started to roll towards me. I think i forgotten to put the break down. It rolled and rolled and soon i was under it. If i dribbled this, please forgive me as i am missing half a face."
Do you think it could have been attempted murder?
"Maybe, i have been eating some of the neighbours carrots this winter."
I actually mean, do you think this was a way of the tractor to get revenge?
What? Mental case you are.

The Tractor said this, "He always ignores me! Like im not even saying a word! But i have spoken to him since i was a puppy. Now im going to go to jail all because of his abuse. I will be known as the saviour by all tractor kind."
But you didnt kill him, they're still going to get hurt because hes still alive. You'll just be known as the tractor that tried his best.
At this point the tractor began to cry. He then rusted up was pulled away to the construction yard to be crushed.

How do you feel about your tractor being crushed?
"Absolutely horrible! They could have just cleaned the blood off and handed it back to me."
Are you not worried it would have tried to kill you again?
"Why the hell are you blaming a machine?"

We then asked the farmers neighbour this:
So what do you make of this whole event?
"Well im just hoping i didnt leave any evidence."
But the tractor did it.
"Is that what they're saying? Perfect!"
What can you say about this?
"Well i am an inventor, i put a voice program in the tractor so it speaks human-like. Gave it a miserable story about abuse."
It all makes sense now. You realise when the police find out you will be jailed for a very long time?
"Whos going to tell them hm?"
The neighbour then threatened me.

I'm going to tell them.
"Oh..."

Well that ends a wonderful case. We dont need the police. We have, THE DAILY CRUMB.

NEWS on GHIBLI PONYO US RELEASE:
Loved, adored & respected by almost every Japanese, movie critic, cinephile and animation fan around the world, the films of Miyazaki Hayao are yet only one step away in fully reaching the west’s mainstream audience. Next year’s release of the English dub of Miyazaki Hayao’s latest film Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea is likely to finally make this step and win the hearts of everyone. Besides the film’s adoring high qualities, an exclusive word on the English dub voice cast has reached GhibliWorld.com.

The US audience version, produced by Frank Marshall and Kathleen Kennedy, is to feature an all-star voice talent cast including Matt Damon, Tina Fey, Cate Blanchett, Liam Neeson, Lily Tomlin, Betty White, Fankie Jonas, Noah Cyrys and Cloris Leachman. Though one will not deny using stardom does not automatically guarantee a good voice dub, it will at least be useful in gaining the mainstream audience’s attention. Those wanting to find out what the end result will be still have the wait a bit though. Test screenings are currently being held, the final version will screen in US theaters in 2009.
www.GhibliWorld.com

- The Daily Crumb

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Traditional Para Cat

Today in the news the 3 candle is attacking me.

Also,
As the course progresses we produce more fun time traditional animations.

Unfortunately, they come out bad quality. But never mind that.

This is para cat jumping on a branch, yaaaay


Traditional Animation TEST: Para Cat and Leaf from Benjamin Biscuitboy on Vimeo.
-The Daily Crumb

Monday, December 01, 2008

The BBC this Christmas

Today in the news Matthew Menhenick makes Harry Hill Joke in, Plymouth.

Well we all know television is the best at Christmas.
And this year there wont be any change.

In the UK the highlights i can pick out are

Wallace and Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death
A Jonathan Creek Special
Doctor Who: The Next Doctor (The door/cyberman clip in this video is funny)
and the various dramatic moments of Eastenders.

Here is a trailer for the drama side of things:
(May only viewable to those in the UK)


Also: I have not seen this video before


Talking of David Tennant. Is this not just the greatest messege you have ever seen?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/s4/misc/advent08/december_01
- The Daily Crumb

Wallace and Gromit on ABC this wedensday

Today in the news you're shaking

Well it looks like Australia has got the TV first. Wallace and Gromit, A Matter of Loaf and Death is still in 'coming soon' stages in the UK.

But on Wedensday 3rd of December the Australian Broadcasting Coporation are broadcasting the half hour/? film.

But for all the rest of us, we get a taster from the ABC website
http://www.abc.net.au/tv/video/preview.htm#?vid=PRM0066191wag

You lucky

- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, November 30, 2008

WALL-E Art Attack!

Today in the news 14,418?

Also, you all remember the classic ART ATTACK series. Well now, sadly Neil Buchanan is getting wrinkles. Of course other channels have been producing ART shows (Terrible ones, by the way) In 2007 the show was axed.

But this year, to end it all Neil is back, with one... more.. BIG picture

-The Daily Crumb

Some WALL-E Hidden Secrets (Easter Eggs)

Today in the news, books are in fashion again.

I was looking through the interweb for secrets in WALL-E but was not successful. You may remember i did a Ratatouille secrets article a while back.
You can see this article here http://dailybloog.blogspot.com/2007/12/ratatouille-secrets.html

Well, I need your help to find more but here are the collection found in the film WALL-E.
CLICK IMAGE FOR LARGE

CLICK IMAGE FOR LARGE

- The Daily Crumb

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Coraline

Today in the news dont forget to read the nursery rhyme....
before the cookies are taken from the cookie jar.
If you knew the question you would not be asking the questions put forward as only a simple, but obviously question related question.

Coraline
Stop Motion animated feature film directed by Henry Selick (Nightmare before Christmas)
It looks absolutely amazing
But annoyingly im not sure whether it is the website, creating the trailers or just some made mix up... but UP and Coraline trailers both have THE SAME SONG
odd...
anyway, amazing AMAZING piece of work coming 2009 (like everything else)

-The Daily Crumb

Nursery Rhyme

Today in the news
Koalas in pajamas are falling down the stairs,
Koalas in pajamas are running to the fairs
Koalas in pajamas are eating teddy bears,
'cos beneath the trees, where nobody sees
They'll hide and seek as long as they please
Today's the day the Koalas will have their picnic
And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish bear!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!
Hey diddle diddle, a fish did a piddle
All the King's soldiers, and all the King's hens
Couldn't put the teddies back together again!

- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Hayk Manukyan

Today in the news coin is on fire.

You may remember Hayk Manukyan, the fantastic animator.
Well now he is playing his character, Harut, with a bit more hair.

I think Robert Benfer and Hayk Manykyan just stole my idea to do live action comedy as well as animation.
It looks like this is the direction things are going.
Hayk, i love your latest video but i still think you should animate a lil more :).
It is all about popularity i suppose, but people dont realise whether you fail on Newgrounds or win a good front page place you still get HEAPS of views.
The treadmill bit is awesome.

If you are not sure what earlier animations of his were, here is an example.

and THIS HERE
is evidence of AMAZING animation

_________________

In other news
Apparently if you view this enough i might get money.

-The Daily Crumb

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Bring on Eddie Izzard!

-A post by Laurajs-
Eddie Izzard
Despite his crazy transvestite clothing, Eddie Izzard really makes me laugh! Compared to other comedians his jokes are extremely random and very unpredictable.

Check out some legos videos of his comedy now!







Friday, November 21, 2008

Very BIG NEWS: New Brackenwood Film?

Today in the news inspiration does fire at you fast. So BreckFEST are giving away free bullet proof vests to prevent skin damage this year.

Yes that is right.
There is not much info on this, it seems like a complete firework of love for his project at the moment.
His live camera, based in his office says, 'Working on: Brackenwood'
So feeps, Adam Phillips' is working on something Brackenwood related. There is no further information on it but i think that is for the best.

We do have the insight of seeing what Adam is working on, on 'non' sunny days though.
If you want to be an absurdly obsessive fan like Sammy the monkey and Nathaniel Tinga the medium... ok, like me.. then check out his brilliant workplace LIVE.
http://www.scribblecel.com/cam/cam.html
Recently i have seen some brilliant freelance work, a running horse. Waterfalls of detail and smooth movement.
So check it out.

Is Bitey back?
Is Bitey going to be bigger than ever?
Or is he going to be a midget? Will he become a vegetarian?
Or will Bingbong be a sneezing news reporter?

- The Daily Crumb

Congratulations

Today in the news Matt hates Fridays

Also:
It has come to my attention that a new Red text comedy film has been released. You may recall these are the many bold RED text american films with RED text actor names on the posters and logos.
BenjaminBiscuitboy

BenjaminBiscuitboy
in
FAT FUNNYAND BISCUITS

AdamSandler ReeceWitherspoon and SteveCarell
in
NOT ANOTHER RED TEXT COMEDY



But this time we are in for a treat, for the influence of Christmas is on our side.


A spark of GREEN

How wonderful

So now i shall link you to the original article on this subject.
http://dailybloog.blogspot.com/2008/10/red-text-comedies.html

- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Dinosaur!


Who actually thinks dinosaurs are extinct!? Where i am here to proove you wrong!

Meet my very own pet dinosaur "fetus"...
However due to his condition "Dinosaurtosis", fetus is unable to explore the outside world and can only stay in a jar full off water. This is why we need your help.."Dinosaurtosis" causes lack of tail growth and corrosive burning on the skin. With the money you donate we are able to cure fetus and all of the dinosaurs who suffer the same condition! Please donate to saveourdinosaursbeforetheysufferfromdinosaurtosis@yahoo.co.uk by including your name, credit card details and other personal information.

Help them now before another dinosaur is born with the same condition!

The Up Himself Timelord Man

Today in the news monkey wears necklace

I disliked that Doctor Who christmas short clip.
just because someone is calling 'doctor!' the doctor thinks he is needed yay jolly running. He wouldnt be expecting a hit and run victim around the corner would he.

and then this up himself man comes along saying he's the doctor.
"The one, the only AND THE BEST!

This, is a job, for a Timelord."


Good: Amazing music when it first begins and nice set.


- The Daily Crumb

Friday, November 14, 2008

They like JAM

Today in the news a balloon fish met up with it's fellow band member Chocolate Coin and started to jam to their earlier singles.

They began We began They began looking into traditional animation today.
Here was a test i found.
Description on the video:
1. This flower catches a falling wand
2. Does spell to create HAT
3. Does spell to create water
4. Blocks water with wand powerz
5. Makes water go into hat with powerz

Animated with no lightbox/onion skin/view of earlier frames.


Click on the image for the members profile


- Teh Doilly Cram

Monday, November 10, 2008

El Materdor

Today in the news
"Dont you remember? You was there too!"
"What? AGHH"



- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, November 09, 2008

The full rescue Squad Mater

Today in the news a man attempted to pull a soar tooth out by glueing it to a passing Lamborghini.
Unfortunately the top half of his body was ripped off.

Also in the news, Mater tells us a story.



- The Daily Crumb

Saturday, November 08, 2008

Pixar goes UPside down

Today in the news that title is not really relevent but it sounds good and could possibly be used in a cheesy newspaper like The Daily Crumb.

The first UP trailer.
Seems Ghibli to me, colourful and adventurous.
Watch it BIG and high quality here

- The Daily Crumb

David Firth's new Film, 'Dog of Man' and Robert Benfer goes to the MOON

Today in the moose we found a packet of crayons.

Robert Benfer (Knox) goes to the moon, keep watching untill the end.
This one IS CHILD FRIENDLY, unlike Firthys



Also in the news:
David Firth released a new film for 2008, you all know him from the creepy and wonderful Salad Fingers, Burnt Face Man and The Child that Smelt Funny (and many many more).
As much as this film is fantastic i would not advise it for younger viewers. Or adults who are easily offended.. honestly, so beware. I warned you.
Of course in a few cases this will offend adults more than younger viewers. So my advice is, unless you are a David Firth fan, dont watch it.

Dog of Man by David Firth (fat-pie.com)(newgrounds.com)


- The Daily Crumb

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Have you ever noticed? Horoscopes 5th November 2008

Tosay in He Nuz
Have you ever noticed that hedges dont normally feed you the berries, you actually have to pick them?
Have you ever noticed that three lost geese is better than the stone?
Have you ever noticed that the wise old man with the hat, scarf and walking stick is actually a giant lizard disguised as a wise old man with a hat, scarf and walking stick?
Have you ever noticed the drawing on the frosted window?
Have you guessed what it is yet?
Did you just say Have you ever guessed?
Have you ever noticed that a fallen fixture can be faster melting snow than a metal sly hood?
Have you ever guessed the right thing once?
Have you ever noticed a flake?
Have uou ever noticed that 'you' was spelt wrong at the beginning of this question?
Excuse me, could you tell me what year it is please?
(He said PLEASE)
Have you ever guessed who said please?
Have you ever noticed Walmut is a real person under that hat?
Have you ever noticed i keep writing have you ever noticed questions?
Have you ever noticed the button is only one of many in hell?
Have you ever noticed the universe?
Have you ever believed in The Secret?
Have you ever wondered why things cost money? If you have, you receive a pat on the head.
Have you ever noticed that mermaids have only been seen in films and plays, WHY DONT THEY EVER COME OUT WHEN THEY'RE NOT BEING PAID?
Have you ever noticed that mermaids are shellfish?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The medium, Nathaniel Tinga's Daily Horoscope:
5th November 2008

Aries
"A bald man or woman is going to enter your cavern (Meaning your home). Dont be alarmed, if you are, it will hurt their feelings. "
Pisces
"I can see a bath, or the sea. Someone you know likes the sea. Their name starts with a letter in the alphabet."
Taurus
"Whilst there is love in the air it is also farming season at the moment! and your next two weeks are going to be filled with glamorous foods."
Aqarius
"Meadow! Pure happiness but a lot of sickness!
Capricorn
"You will come across an abandoned fridge."
Gemini
"You are not a very nice person. The stars say you will have an epiphany."
Cancer
"It is nice to see you but you have no future"
Sagittarius
This week you will come across a wild animal, but no worries, this could also mean a new friend or enemy. Or you could be eaten alive.
Scorpio:
"Buy that thing you've always wanted to buy! Just buy buy buy until you are poor and begging for money. (Whether you buy or not the stars say you WILL be poor."
Leo:
"I see yellow, you're going to wet yourself in an awkward situation. Possibly involving a very important meeting which some very important people."
If your star is missing please go to nathanviney.com!:
"As it rains, oddly enough you are going to melt like an icecream in the sun."
Virgo:
"Looks like today the stars are on your side! Your next week will involve money and buisness. I can see that themepark you've been planning to replace the elderly home with finally being build."
Libra:
"I can see a bird, a child or younger relative of yours is going to reach out and attempt to fly in the big world."

- The Daily Crumb

Monday, November 03, 2008

50 of the Worlds Best Marbles

Today in the mews a giant tub of ink was stabbed, pushed and forced to roll down a high hill. There is an investigation occuring at this point in time.

Sergeant Theo Clok spoke about the matter: "Are you being spammed this article in an email? dont blame yourself. Blame the stars.
I would like to release the fact that this is a suspected murder investigation. We have fourteen suspects, and all of these were at the scene of the crime. Every single one of them had ink on their hands and shirts.

One has told us he tried to reach out and save the giant tub of ink but was unsuccessful. We in the police people place disagree. We say all of them pushed the tub.
After a few experiments we discovered only fifteen people could actually push a giant tub of ink like this one.

It is obvious that they did not have a fifteenth person so decided to STAB the tub, leaking the fluid and causing it to become easier to push.
None of our suspects have given in to our torture as of yet. The police force sends thoughts out to the family of the poor fat tub of ink."

Here at the Daily Crumb, myself, Sammy the monkey and Laurajs stood in a minute of silence to remember the great tub that used to be our buddy, Fat tub of ink.

- The Daily Crumb
+






down here

Sunday, November 02, 2008

The AntiCrumb

Today in the news 3 posts in one day IS going too far!

As you may have noticed somebody sent in an application form to apply for a job here at The Daily Crumb. Laurajs, the writer of Project Insanity which closed down due to racist comments in 2003 said this about The Daily Crumb: "I hang out with them alot yet they treat me like dirt sometimes! Either they're being snappy at me when im trying to help or they're complaining about another person to me!"

NEW THINGS:
Please! Interested in writing for the Daily Crumb? We dont care anymore. Come along and send us a form.
All info can be found here

Also!
Do you really like reading the Daily Crumb? But continuously forget to check up on it?
Or we write too fast for you?
Then SUBSCRIBE!
Do EXACTLY the same as you do for application and the Crumb will be delivered to your email every new article!
So once again, check out this link and email me your name

- The Daily Crumb


Joined the forces of the Daily Crumb!


Right guys i have taken over the Daily Crumb! Well joined forces with the editor himself..

My name is laura however you can call me Darth Vader..
No?
Darn i tried!


Right whats in the news today? Hmm Spam..SPAM and more spam!


Doesn't he look like a happy chappy!!

Heres a story for you..has anyone ever shopped at aldi?

You must! There is so many biscuits that i haven't heard of there..

Next time you go there get Discos!

or if your in the mood to be evil to a famous singer..just steal a pack of Madonnas biscuits!
I hope this post was enjoyable and i didn't make you hungry!
Today in the news here is a picture i drew for Halloween

- The Daily WooOOoo!? .. no?.. ok

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Halloween was yesterday

Today in the news soon you will have to register to find out the news!
Comment on this below.

Would you like to be a writer for The Daily Crumb? The only online newspaper ON THE INTERNET that updates often to no readers at all?
Well now you can!
Just fill out this form!
Name:
Then just


After that you'll get the job! No trust is required, you're right in here with all the controls to delete and move every image.
Plus! You get to post lots of spammy posts just to annoy me and the other invisible readers.
If you REALLY want to ruin someone's day you can even DELETE the blog.
But that is if you REALLY are FUNNY MAN SATAN.
Hahahah!
Hilarious?
No!
Well listen to this stand up act ive got planned.

"So i was walking down the street and suddenly i saw a drum kit, and it was raining. What are the chances of that? Drum kit, AND raining in the SAME street!
So anyway the cars are driving past, wind their windows down and saying, 'A'Right mate?'.
AHAHA would you believe that? 'A'Right mate?'
ahaha! 'A'Right mate?'
So there i was, street, drum kit, raining and these bloke saying 'A'Right mate?'"


That is an extract. Hope you enjoyed it.
If i did not explain earlier (Which i did not) i am looking for another writer due to fact that i AM moving into the stand up comedy buisness myself. Soon i will be up there with the greats, Lee Evans, Peter Kay and Tony Blair.
So look out for my on the television!

- The Daily Crumb

The news today

Now some very important news in the news today. The news is that news has become so extra new that news reporters have found the new news hard to news report. The news is, news may have become the new ipod. The news department of New South Wales have employed a new news specialist to inquire into the new news ways of the spoken news reports.
News reporter Nelson Mews spoke about the new never ending news report due to be released on the new year. Muse and the BBC new news report team associated with New South Wales and the great Mount Current Affair company knocked down the news reporters union of news and related news. News reporter Noola Newz knows the news but does not feel it is news worthy as it includes the news.
More news on this later.

Friday, October 31, 2008

REAL Cars Toys

Today in the news a man of 43 is suffering from 'Burger Burp.'
McDonalds have not commented on the issue. For those unaware of this disease i would like to explain: 'Burger Burp' develops in the body occasionally when a person eats a burger without a drink. The person's breath becomes horrible and then they will continuously burp for 3 days until he/she dies.
The body is then crushed to release grease which is used in our motorcars.

Also in the news while we are on the rise of PIXAR's Car's related articles
CHECK OUT THESE TOYS


- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Alice's Birthday

Today in the news Hally Flowerhood denied all the conspiracy theories

ALSO
I was on ColdHardFlash.com
and came across this trailer for an animated film. Animated... with flash!
Unfortunately most of the information avaliable about it is in Russian but i am sure you can appreciate the artwork here.
"Alice’s Birthday, is an upcoming 2009 Russian flash-animated feature film directed by Sergey Seryogin and being made by the studio “MASTER-FILM”. It is based on one of a series of stories by well-known writer Kir Bulychyov about Alisa (Alice) Seleznyova, a young girl living in the second half of the 21st century."


Film promo reel
http://www.cartoonbrew.com/feature-film/alices-birthday

- The Daily Crumb

IT IS ALL ABOUT PIXAR

Edit: Today in the news a fish ran away with a dune

check out this AMAZING art website for PIXAR!
http://www.theartofpixar.com/

From the new CARS TOONS for TV is the US
Well i am very sorry but it looks like the video clip has been taken off of youtube.
It starred Mater as a fire engine!

You can still watch one of the clips from the show
here
http://lineboil.com/2008/10/car-toons-premieres-on-toon-disney/


- The Daily Crumb

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

A write up

Today in the news words are only the diamond in the harbour.

In important news today:
"Excuse me, could you take over?"
"But you're the one getting paid to guard the door."
"Yes i know.. but... i need the toilet."
"Why?"
"Why? Well, because i drank alot earlier."
"Oh right, so that is an excuse now is it? Gosh, did the dog eat your homework?"
"No... please, i am busting."
"No, i am only paid to serve free drinks."
"Yes, it was your FREE DRINKS that caused this."
"So it is my fault is it? Well, you are not doing a very good job of winning me over."
"Just stand by the door untill i get back!"
"I said no. Do you know what that means?"
"Yes it means Yes"
"No."
"You really are a git."
"I try to be, drink?"
"no."
"Sure?"
"You realise if i move, certain government information may become avaliable to any old passer by wondering into the secure room?"
"No, i did not realise that. Still will not do it though."
"AARG!"
"Wait.. what kind of government information?"
"Well, where the treasure is hidden of course."
"You're joking?"
"Nope."
"Oh... well i suppose i could stand there for a lil while."
"No i dont trust you now."
"PLEASE!"
"Nope, you said no no no. you cannot just change your mind like that."
"Please! You can have another free drink!"
"What about free pie?
"Yes!!"
"Ok, you stand there while i go to the toilet."


(He returns)
"Have fun standing by the door?"
"Well i wondered in, they asked me who i was. i said a passer by. they asked where their guard was and i said i think i saw him nip to the toilet. So i think you are fired."
"Now you are joking."
"Of course i am! Now i know where the treasure is! WOOHOO!"
"No way! how?"
"I went in and served them all free drinks! Heard them speaking! Problem is, the key to the treasure is in one of the men's clipboards."
"Oh.. Well where is it?"
"I am git. I wont tell you."
"Oh come on, i didnt mean that."
"Oh alright, *whispers*"

(The important men leave the room)

"Where have they gone off to?"
"Toilet, too many of my free drinks!"
"You know what this means dont you..."
"What?"
"Key, now!"
"Go on then."
"Are you not coming? You were all excited about it a moment ago."
"Nah, you go. I trust you to get the key."
"Oh, ok."

"Oh.. hi there.. i did not realise there was still someone in here."
"What are you doing here? Are you trying to get the key?"
"What! No of course not, i was just checking if you were all ok."
"Even though the larger % of us just left the room?"
"Yep.."
"Entering this room while there is a meeting is forbidden. You are fired and you will be fined your lifes earnings."


"How did it go?"
"Grand."
"I forgot to mention one of them did not drink."
"Oh yeah thanks."
"It's ok, ere, want to go to Disneyland next week?"
"No."
"Ok.... you realise that is where the treasure is buried?"
"Yes, you whispered it to me earlier."
"Ok. Well ill be seeing you, lucky that man brought his clipboard to the loo with him i would never have gotten this key on his way out!"
"You mean to say you had the key when you sent me in?"
"I'm a git."
"Lovely. Disneyland it is."

- The Daily Crumb

Donkey in the Rain

Today in the news there is a donkey, pony and a bird in the rain. I feel so sorry for them.

This is... well a video response to John Hutch's minute of madness.
which you can watch here

So this is a minute of madness.


Sorry but the minute of madness has gone missing

thankyou for your concern.
Please do not smoke



Clips from Eastenders BBC

- The Daily Crumb

Monday, October 27, 2008

The medium is asked to check out a haunted house.

Today in the news fiddle with wires.

Also in the news
Professional Medium Nathanial Tinga was asked to check out a haunted house today.
This video is nothing special, just another home movie.



- The Daily Crumb

Matthew Menhenick's adaption of Harvest Moon

Today in the news
The new BATMAN villain confirmed.


Also, Matthew Menhenick released a new flash animation yesterday based on Harvest Moon, A Wonderful Life.
http://blobcorp.blogspot.com


- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Red text comedies.

Today in the news this is a pointless post for pointless people.

There it is again!
Red text comedies!
Another one! they just keep coming.
They are the films that pass us by and get forgotten.. untill they are shoved in front of our eyes again. (Usually)
THICK, RED, BLACK CAPITAL LETTERS

Red makes it's way into a lot of American comedy logos. Over time you will notice more of these being released after reading this.
As Dreamworks pumps out storyless animated adventures about fluffy animals (no offense kung fu panda) America continues to make these comedies.

Maybe i should just say, GET SOME MORE UNIQUE LOGOS, YOU ALL LOOK THE SAME!
Hazah!
Red text has become the automatic comedy logo for American films. i noticed it on a lot of Eddie Murphy films as well.

Sorry Simon

Just have a look around and you will see :D Daddy day care, Cehaper by the Dozen,
This one might not be red.
but it still has that thick/thin thing going on

And here is one that has seaped into the UK

aaaaand now
just to prove my point

mmm pancakes

You get the picture.. a lot of them.

Update:
Also
It has come to my attention that a new Red text comedy film has been released. You may recall these are the many bold RED text american films with RED text actor names on the posters and logos.
BenjaminBiscuitboy

BenjaminBiscuitboy
in
FAT FUNNYAND BISCUITS

AdamSandler ReeceWitherspoon and SteveCarell
in
NOT ANOTHER RED TEXT COMEDY
But this time we are in for a treat, for the influence of Christmas is on our side. A spark of GREEN


And it is not all about the full title you know.
On almost every single poster and logo i have on this page the main 'actors' names are written in the same way. Red, and Black.


- The Daily Crumb.

Friday, October 24, 2008

The Incredibly whatever man made a blog.

Today in the news snowman earmuffs but otherwise that i pronounce better batter, but only tommorows.
Also in the news if you understand what was said above i congratulate you.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The medium, Nathaniel Tinga's Daily Horoscope:

Aries
"Tommorow will be the right day for you. Take that step you wanted to take earlier on."
Pisces
"It is ok to tell people your feelings, trust those around you. Also dont trust anyone. That is important"
Taurus
"Terror has striked your family, maybe a money crisis or social problem. If you are unaware of anything ask a family member of the problems."
Aquarius
"There will be a lot of rain in your area this week but will summer up during friday afternoon and lead on to the weekend."
Capricorn
"You have to overcome a problem you are facing. But you will also win a battle this week. I am not sure whether that is a competiton or whether it is just physical violence which is always a good laugh."
Gemini
"A disease will plague you this week. But sleep it off and you will be fine."
Cancer
"You know someone whos name starts with K or M. They are going to be kind or mean to you in the coming days."
Sagittarius

"This week you will come across a wild animal, but no worries, this could also mean a new friend or enemy."
Scorpio
"Buy that pet you've always wanted to buy!"
Leo
"You want to go on a holiday but something is pulling you back. I think it is best you stay for the moment. there are huge opportunities waiting for you."
Virgo
"Stay quiet, there is nothing for you. I am sorry, i can see a bright future, but nothing for the moment."
Libra
"You can do it! That is all i have to say, whether it is smoking, eating or biting your nails, keep at it. I can see a breakthrough on the hill."


It looks like The Incredibly Amazing Man got himself a blog.
You can check it out here
I have not spoken to him since filming so dont ask me anything.
http://myincredibleblog.blogspot.com/



Not really a fan to be honest. Not exactly sure WHAT he is famous for. But if you are, do whatever, check it out.
As you can see Technicolor are providing us with colour at the moment due to the fact that we cannot afford it ourselves.

All projects have been cancelled until we gain some more money.



If you would like to step into the lift i can tell you your future.
- The Daily Crumb
and guest, Nathaniel Tinga, professional Medium.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

How to write a Resume

Today in the news Enid Blyton appeared for a second due to a shock in time.

How to write a Resume/CV with Mr. Mood.

Orright lets began.
First fing off is to start with the awesomeness that is my name.
Mr. Mood. Then give em sumthin to laugh at like a lil joke or sumthin near your address. My address is a bit secret so ill blink it out
blink blink blink, Walkhampton, Drive carefully would you? (That was the joke! See! It real captures the onlookers lookings it does. Dont worry, i aint got a chainsaw.)
If you like you can look up a cheesey off up on the interwebs but dont worry bout hat if you dont feel like having the time hey hey!
So we onto the um , the wumbers now. The wumbers are the code that is on your post box and you hav to liek swap it and put it on the paper. So go ahead and do that now and we'll get started.
So this is a resume i made earlier.

Dear Mrs. (Dont write Miss, or Mr if it is a married woman ok? Or an old woman who is not married or sumthin caus it dont matter. Hatch! Dont woz bout everything. But it is very important if you feel like it matters)
So i'm writing Dear Mrs. Menhenick (Caus this was bak when he was a woman see.)
Nah just kidding, but you can put that if you like it will make them laugh for the funny.
So anyway you can speaks about the weaver if you like.

"Oh the weaver is raining. Allthat jazz. Look, im gunna go and grab and stacks to eat and if you like yuo cvan eat with me on a lil coffee table or watever with chocolate cake and we can talk about paying me and how good would that be! com sit down!"

It is very important to impress your reader/reasdems.
So is the bells youi hear em.
Next part is experience and skiklll;s and all dat hazz got it?
okie dokey ! Lets bagan
skilsl:
My skills are! Real smart, nice hat, good with my villager folk.
I dont need to do a resume reals. caus like, i am like da main guy in Walkhampton like, i order everybutt round and just ya know, organise and jail. I is the village mayor, real estate agent and police popicer.
Is real good at doing m y job (You cans say dis)

And den you sign it off with a tick and you done.
The best way to sign it.. is in blood.... so... Matt, hand me a knife so i can cut my hand... for the signature...

I HAVE IT


- The Daily Crumb

Monday, October 20, 2008

Horrible News

Today in the news
BLOB ATTACKED BY DOG

These photos were taken whilst shooting a new short film titled The Incredibly Amazing Man.

As blob recovers in hospitals Matthew Menhenick sits by the bed crying into a large bucket of rainbow tears.


- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, October 19, 2008

NathanViney.com

Today in the news a dish ran away with the moon

ALSO
As renewing my whole website requires time and effort i did not do this.
Instead i revamped the moving image section to be much more simpler to use seperating live action and animation. Plus creating new icons for each film.
http://www.nathanviney.com


- The Daily Crumb

Saturday, October 18, 2008

THE INCREDIBLY AMAZING MAN

Today in the news wait i need a lift

My new short animation i mentioned last post is out today.
The Incredibly Amazing Man


You can watch it pure brilliant quality at
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/465244
or not so brilliant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjNLbelKUsU

- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, October 16, 2008

OK MATT

Today in the news a set of earphones set fire to a rapper.

Matthew Menhenick from blobcorp.blogspot.com has been complaining that there has been no release of information on animation or film projects.
Well, that is because there was none...
until today.

The next 'LAZYmation. I like to call them... (these are basically limited animation with lip sync for youtube) (papa fat/willy wonka) will be titled, "The Incredibly Amazing Man."

and the next feature film will be titled, ICECREAM. no more info on that one. i will attempt to keep updated on the work.

- The Daily Crumb

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Official Alien Day

Wow! I think today is official Alien day here at the Daily Crumb!
Today in the news it had been reported a little earlier on that a vessel from the Alien Federation of Light would be arriving in the US. (No joke)
It did!
It abducted Queen Get your head out of the clouds! So, she's gone, i can start branding everything back to it's original state.
Esn Quote: "So many people have placed bets that bookies have stopped accepting them. Which obviously means that it will come true!"
And here is the astonishing blog that predicted it all! http://10-14-08.blogspot.com/

I dont know, the world is insane. Or is it the people that live in it? Of course it is.
So let us escape this ugly planet and venture into a new world.
I am a huge fan of the youtube flash and live action film maker Christian Madsen.
To the planet Gacrux!
Where a janitor has had a bad day.

Enjoy his new animation! Here is his youtube page


- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, October 09, 2008

The chair of Evil Whisper

Words from Queen Get-your-head-out-of-the-clouds!!:
Sat here in the office head chair of the Daily Crumb i have become a little frightened. You see, i did not look into the past of the company before buying it.
People dieing... all of them.
And this morning and ever since i have felt a horrible cold feeling sitting here. I am too scared to move. I am literally frozen at this moment in time.. apart from typing hands.
My father, King do-whatever-because-when-you're-dead-you-wont-remember always used to tell me to think of the ocean and how it will be the first to kill me.
So what is it?
I am going to call up Nathan, the EX owner.
"Nathan?"
"Yes?"
"What is that in the background?"
"You can see through the phone? It is a shelf"
"No i mean the sound."
"It's.. Monkey, journey to the west. Why do you sound so less evil today Queen?"
"You speak so rudely of me."
"And you are not ordering my head be cut off. Are you upset about something?"
"A little. Where is your home?"
"You're in it."
"I am? Well where are you?"
"Outside."
"So where is the music coming from?"
"You turned it on earlier."
"HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME, THE QUEEN, OF DOING SOMETHING I MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT DO!"
"Ok, hush with the mood swings Queeny. It is probably just the ghost of Sennheiser."
"Who?"
"Dont worry, the only people that knew him were those who read every single lengthy story posted on the Daily Crumb in the day of June/July i believe."
"So who was he?"
"He was an old friend. He died. Now he is a ghost. Oh yeah, i was rather mean to him so he is not very nice to anyone in this building anymore."
"OW."
"What Queen?"
"Kicked me!"
"Who?"
"The ghost."
"Yogurt... it is all chinese."
"Are you listening? THE GHOST KICKED ME! I ORDER YOU TO GET RID OF IT!"
"No, i was the one that kicked you."
"What?"
"I'm standing right next to you."
"You dare kick the Queen?"
"I did yes. NOW GET OUT OF MY CRUMB!"
"OFF WITH HIS HEAD!"
"There is no one here Queen Get your head out of the clouds. You're ALL on your own. If you disapeared, no one would care."
"They would! i am the queen!"
"I disagree. But to prove my point, lets find out."
..
>:)


The knights of my kingdom have taken Nathan Viney to have his head chopped off. They came in helicopters as soon as they heard my phone call. Good bye to him. The fool!
How dare he!!!

He left the door open.
HOW DARE HE!!!
oh.. i am no longer cold.

- The Daily Boredom Baby

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Hello everyone! I have bought the Daily Crumb!

I am Queen Get your head out of the clouds!
I am throwing the traditional 'Today in the news' into the fire where it will burn. Until it is crispy bacon, and edible.
Because crispy bacon is edible! HAHAHA
I order you too laugh.
I was EXTREMELY BORED and meant to be doing my paper work but it has been failing. The paper pile is way too high. So i decided to buy The Daily Crumb and rename it.

So in the Daily Boredom Baby i will be presenting my favourite things of all time.
1. Smartly dressed people
2. Smartly dressed salads
3. Apple biscuits are good
4. My kingdom of doom.

THANKYOSL!
- QUEEN GET YOUR EHAD OUT OF THE CLOUDS

The Daily Boredom Baby

Today in the news we have been bought out by the evil Queen Get your head out of the Clouds!!!!

As i am asked to pack up my boxes she tells me the new title of the Crumb.
The Daily Boredom Baby..

- The Daily Crumb

Monday, October 06, 2008

Saint Mercury's Mountain Climation

Metal things keep dropping on my head
Today in the news i am addicted to Oasis' new album. Although it has not come out yet... every song has been released to listen to on their myspace page.
Until they are taken off there is no need for buying it (silly Oasis)

Also some important news:
Saint Mercury went to Benjamin Biscuitboy today asking permission to start a foundation for mountain climation. This would involve getting into highly developed space pods and molding the mountains with giant flame throwers whilst climbers try to reach the top.
You can choose which class you would like to be in. Climbers, or murderers.

Also in the news
Saint Mercury of the Mercury and Physio therapy church has released information on his new hit album.
It will be titled, "When climbers like to fall."
The first single will be titled, "Crispy."

I do hope i get money."

That was Saint Mercury there advertising his newest and greatest and only last album.
Saint Mercury hopes he will get money.

Also in the news i must scream about Blob Corps next film. It is a flash cartoon based on the original game Harvest Moon (For gamecube i believe). With a unique story and some new characters, these are words from her mouth. I mean, his. Matthew Menhenick posted screenshots on his blog.
I must applaud his active animating whilst i dig the dirt for a cure to laziness.
You can find some fantastic screenshots on the blog:

EXCITING AY
Where are my ideas huh? I have a few, just all seperate and need clicking together.


- The Daily Crumb

Sunday, October 05, 2008

The Tune

cToday in the news:
"It is the truth, everything that i once said. If you do not believe me, look at the rainbow."
Amazing and inspiring words from the great Lemington Squid who died today after falling down a hole and getting some dirt in his eyes.

There was a young boy walking down the lane, he was asked to grab the rubbish. But as he went to Bag It Up he fell backwards at The Shock of the Lightning.
A man moved up to him, a Solider On a hover craft. He told the boy of the Nature of Reality and that soon they would all be Falling Down.

They stood in the silent. Just Waiting for the Rapture. "It is The Turning!" In the distance the road started to rip upwards, pulling cars and homes with it. A rip through the concrete, a woman was riding away from the wave of destruction on a horse.
"Get Off Your High Horse Lady!" Shouted the Solider waving. She jumped off still looking at the flowing madness in the sky. "What are we going to do?"
The solider looked at the boy, "Aint got Nothin."
Suddenly a man appeared with a large hat and tie holding his watch on his wrist. "Oh no, I'm Outta Time. I came too late, this is the end of the world!"
"NO!" The heroic boy screamed, "Let us all Dig Out Your Souls! We will go To Be Where There's Life!!!"


The Tune

Is it pink,
Is it purple?
Is it shaped like a circle?
Or maybe a bucket or two?

Is it fast?
Is it fare?
Is it sharp like a square?
Filled with beasts and with ghouls. Just like you!

Is it holy?
Is it snowy?
Does it call itself Toby?
Does it take you for a fool?

Does it present you with gifts?
Down the river it hitches
a ride with a man made of glue.

Its DEAD
Filled with Geese!


- The Daily Crumb

Friday, October 03, 2008

Flatworld

Today in the news a lonely said to a drunk, "Gods over there." and the drunk was hit by a car.

Here is a fantastic film we watched at college today
Part 1

Part 2

Part 3


Also i must mention Matthew Menhenicks blog is no longer RMN COPZ. it is now Blobcorp.blogspot.com

- the Daily Crumb

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

AMBUSH REWIND

Today in the news
i remember the day we were asked to produce a pixillation, a human animation. The three of us, Matt, Mud and I shot ideas into the air hoping for some of them to clash.
Luckily one did, the time travelling, action packed, mobile theif.

Our very first film, the first with Matthew Menhenick and the first in the UK.
Enjoy



- The Daily Crumb

Friday, September 26, 2008

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Spore Review

Today in the news:

A funny review on yutube (Warning: Language)


- The Daily Crumb

Gold Snap!

I just watched a great dvd, film called Golf Snap. It has David Tennant and Timothy Dalton in it!
It is so hilarious, i recommend
It did not seem like a very interesting theme but the films antics brightened up our day for sure! The scene with the windmill and the money basket inspired us to watch more.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

A Bug's Life vs ANTZ . The full story

Today in the news it is 1998.
And in the ring today is A bug's life and ANTZ. ANTZ throws the first punch with capital letters. A bug's life pulls himself up and throws in a hit with character design.
ANTZ hits back hard. A Bug's Life feels a swollen nose but soon swings in with animation. Before ANTZ can say anymore it is stomped on with the power of storyline. Or is it? ANTZ holds A bug's life's foot in place, and then shoves his opponent onto the floor.
Standing over A bug's life ANTZ wipes sweat from his forhead with a giant Z. A bug's life is up again still strong ready for another slice. But before anything can be done ANTZ swipes a punch with celebrity voice actors.
A bug's life is down!
A BUG'S LIFE IS UP! A heavy hit into ANTZ' face with 91% Rotten Tomatoes reviews! Oh no, ANTZ shakes head in a 95% review-like fashion.
Is this the end for Bugs? Lying on the floor, beaten by Antz? Surely not!
ANTZ stares down spitting out some more celebrity voice actors.
The ring goes quiet.

A bug's life has pulled himself up in a cheesy end of movie- like fashion, with the power of LOVE. ANTZ is DOWN! and missing a head!.?....Ouch.
The referee has run in to count down beside ANTZ. As the numbers flow it looks like we know our winner, A bug's life!
ANTZ is up! What a surprise. Normally the power of love wins the battle. ANTZ has grabbed a knife! He's going for A bug's life!!!
OHNO

Unfortunatley A bug's life passed away... but you can still collect it on dvd. ANTZ lost, the stabbing was counted as cheating. He was soon arrested but died in jail.

- Our Daily Crumb.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Parents and Teachers

Today in the news the Pottery channel on FOX and SKY television has had a complaint:

"What are my children watching? These people are teaching our kids that little men live in their heads! Today my son was trying to put tables and chairs in his ear. They were dolls house ones of course. But his younger sister was not happy with the ear waxed coffee table she found in her living room.
My son was going to walk out of the house with a musical note tie on today! If he went out like that he'd be shot for sure! By the way, i'm in America!
These channels are not safe for learning kids. We do not want them to grow up extremely dumb do we?
Please reply soon Mr. or Mrs. Government.
- Margaret Remeson
________________
This is a real letter. NO JOKE
It is a joke.

Also in the news as BreskFEST draws to a triangular hault one man HAS SOMETHING TO SAY.
"Good morning class my name is Mr. Jacobs. Could you repeat that?"
"..."
"Class?"
"Good morning class my name is Mr. Jacobs. Could you repeat that"
"no, just the Mr. Jacobs please."
"Mr. Jacobs please."
"Ok, typical... unoriginal... lousy. I've got you all in a bottle and i know what you will be like. Drunken losers pregnant with alien grandchildren on the streets of some build replica set of Hollywood."
"Are you going to do the names sir?"
"Yes i suppose. No point in learning any of your names though, you'll all be nobodies by the time you leave this school. Gosh, you're nobodies already, i dont know your names!"
"My name is Ben sir."
"No, did i ask for a name? ONE! If you were important i'd know your name already and TWO what the hell kind of stage name is Ben? Mr. Jacobs, now that is memorable. Here, have two dollars."
"Dollars?"
"It's Australian."
"Australian?"
"Oh my god. Dont tell me, locked in your rooms playing game boys until you're pulled out of the house in your dressing gowns by a metal claw, milk down your front from messy cereal and then sat by your classroom desk?"
"?"
"No it is fine, you dont need to say anything you SKUM! What does your normal teacher TEACH you? I imagine she finds it hard to cope with your terrible behaviour."
"Crayon drawings."
"Smart boy are you ******?"
"MR. JACOBS!"
"What what? i am so sorry headmaster.. i was.... the language slipped out. They are fantastic children really. They have not made one little sound, and.... yes. Best class i've EVER HAD! Arent you class? I am serious.. honestly... no really.. wow! They are silent arent they?"
"Yes they are Mr. Jacobs... One of them has said you have been whipping the children."
"I.. uh .. what?"
"The police are waiting to have a little chat in the corridor"
"I.. NEVER! I HAVE NEVER!... in my days! done anything like that! WHO TOLD YOU THIS?"
"A very reliable source."
"A STUDENT? That is not a reliable source! THEY ARE SKUM!"
"I rest my case Mr. Jacobs. you are fired."
"But my mother left me alone in a cold room! The roof had a leak! LEAVE ME BE, ME NEED MONEY."
"And a Therapist."

- The Daily Crumb

- The Daily Crumb

- The Daily Crumb

ERROR

Friday, September 12, 2008

The Silver Screen Collection

Today in the news


- The Daily Crumb

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Village Survey (Short video)

Today in the news you may notice the words i speak were written down a little earlier in the week.


- The Daily Crumb

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Crawling with compost (another Pre- Silver Screen)

Today in the news the weird couple in 'Walkhampton Stores' have been fined after leaving out too much rubbish.
This is what they had to say, "Well it aint our fault we got a lot of useless stock .We eat and eat until we can't get out."
Mr. Clapton walked passed with his clipboard and knocked on the door.
"Hello! Village survey!."
("Oh look! You've cut me arm off now!"
"Sorreeee")

Clapton turned and began back down the street past the pub and up to the red telephone box.

"Old beauty you are int ya?"

Telepone box: "Oh yes. I am older than anything else in the village."

"Would you like to do the village survey?"

Telepone box: "Oh sure."

"What did you think of the vegetable competition turn out?"

Telepone box: "Oh... i could not make it to that one."

"Ok. No worries. Next question, what do you think of the pub?"

Telepone box: "Well it looks good from the outside... but never been in."

"Oh.. no that is fine. Next, will you be attending the fair?"

Telepone box: "No."

"You say you're the oldest but you dont seem to have the village spirit."

Telepone box: "I am a phone box.. "

"Still. Last question, any family?"

Telepone box: "Yes actually"

"Oh really, and where are they?"

Telepone box: "Scattered across the United Kingdom."

"Oh dear me... right... well. No comments from me! Have a nice day sir."

Telepone box: "You too..."

*ring*

Matt: "Yes?"

"Hello! My name is Mr. Clapton. I see you are staying at the village hotel."

Matt: "It is basically a cave."

"Fine fine! So! Tell me about yourself, friends?"

Matt: "Well the medium murdered my boss in the city and i dont know anyone in the village."

"AGH! You're a bog then."

Matt: "A what?"

"It is what we like to call outsiders of the village. Have a nice day sir."

Matt: "Wait, dont you want to survey me?"

"Only villagers are surveyed. So long!"

Matt: "Oh, if you see the medium, DONT TELL HIM WHERE I AM!"

"Okeydoke."

- The Daily Crumb